A lot of people think it is a good idea for university students to work a part time job in addition
학생이 쓴 원문
In my opinion, working a part time job is not essential, but helpful for university students in many ways. Some people say that focusing on studying is much more efficient. In deed, not only for specific studies, such as medicine, engineering and law, many study areas require a lot of time to study. If students devote too much time to work, it can affect their studies negatively. Nevertheless, I recommend that students try working a part-time job at least once. By earning money on their own, they can learn a financial sense. If you are so busy, you can work during a vacation. Moreover, through part-time job experiences, you can learn how to cope with unexpected situations, communicate with various people, and manage your money. Although you might go through something bad while working a part-time job, I believe that you can mature and develop yourself.
강사 첨삭
[이름],
You explained your opinion well and gave balanced reasons about part-time jobs. Well done!
~ Trixia
CONTENT:
In my opinion, working a part time job is not essential, but helpful for university students in many ways.
~ In my opinion, working a part-time job is not essential, but it is helpful for university students in many ways.
Some people say that focusing on studying is much more efficient.
~ CORRECT.
In deed, not only for specific studies, such as medicine, engineering and law, many study areas require a lot of time to study.
~ Indeed, not only for specific studies such as medicine, engineering, and law, but many study areas also require a lot of time to study.
If students devote too much time to work, it can affect their studies negatively.
~ CORRECT.
Nevertheless, I recommend that students try working a part-time job at least once.
~ CORRECT.
By earning money on their own, they can learn a financial sense.
~ By earning money on their own, they can develop a sense of financial responsibility.
If you are so busy, you can work during a vacation.
~ If students are too busy, they can work during vacation.
Moreover, through part-time job experiences, you can learn how to cope with unexpected situations, communicate with various people, and manage your money.
~ Moreover, through part-time job experiences, students can learn how to cope with unexpected situations, communicate with various people, and manage their money.
Although you might go through something bad while working a part-time job, I believe that you can mature and develop yourself.
~ Although students might go through some difficulties while working a part-time job, I believe they can mature and develop themselves.
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