my homework
학생이 쓴 원문
There are many opinions about the punishment of criminals, but to be honest, it\'s all okay.
Longer sentences allow people to quarantine in society for a long time, and in some cases, completely isolate criminals.
However, food, water, and living conditions during the period are not free, so in some cases our taxes can be spent on criminals.
Therefore, I think that intensive labor will be a good edification for criminals. If you work hard for a long time and take a certain percentage of the money, tax use will be reduced and criminalization will be sufficient.
강사 첨삭
Good morning Lee! Happy Friday! Overall, your essay shows a good understanding of the topic and a clear attempt to express your opinion about the punishment of criminals. However, to improve, try to use simpler and more direct sentences, and focus on accurate vocabulary. Organizing your ideas more clearly will also help.
Longer sentences allow people to quarantine in society for a long time, and in some cases, completely isolate criminals.
However, food, water, and living conditions during the period are not free, so in some cases our taxes can be spent on criminals.
Therefore, I think that intensive labor will be a good edification for criminals.
>>> TEACHER GEMMA
There are many opinions about the punishment of criminals, but to be honest, it\'s all okay.
>>> CORRECT~!^^
OR>>> There are many opinions about how to punish criminals, but I think different methods can be useful.
Longer sentences allow people to quarantine in society for a long time, and in some cases, completely isolate criminals.
>>> Longer prison sentences can keep dangerous criminals away from society for a long time.
However, food, water, and living conditions during the period are not free, so in some cases our taxes can be spent on criminals.
>>> However, prisons cost a lot of money because the government must pay for food, water, and living conditions. This means taxpayers have to pay for criminals.
Therefore, I think that intensive labor will be a good edification for criminals.
>>> For this reason, I think compulsory work for prisoners could be a good idea.
If you work hard for a long time and take a certain percentage of the money, tax use will be reduced and criminalization will be sufficient.
>>> If prisoners work while in prison, they can help reduce costs. It may also help them learn discipline and become better people in the future.
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