첨삭 부탁드립니다.

2017-07-17 · 첨삭 강사 Jeny

학생이 쓴 원문

I took up a degree in Multimedia Enginnering and a master's degree in informatin security. It is an advantage on my part to take my master's degree at night for 3 years while I was working. In additin, I published me thesis about Business Continuity Plan in information security part. I'm working at SK Infosec, which is the biggest local company in information security field in Korea. My job position is a information security consultant. I handdled a lot of project related with information security. I used to work for finance company, such as bank, securities, Marine & Fire Insurance. As a information security consultant, I identified information assets and their value. I checked business needs for information processing and communication. I set Information Security policies, guidelines, templates to implement customer's protection activity in compliance with ISMS Standard, Privacy act, Information network act, etc.

강사 첨삭

Hello [이름]!!
Thank you for your homework!!!
I am very happy that you are eager to learn a lot of things and you want to know which field that you need to practice more. It is a good thing and it means that you are interested in learning a lot of things. I commend you for that.
T. Jeny

I took up a degree in Multimedia Enginnering and a master\'s degree in informatin security.
>>I took up a degree in Multimedia Engineering and a master\'s degree in information security.
It is an advantage on my part to take my master\'s degree at night for 3 years while I was working.
>>correct
In additin, I published me thesis about Business Continuity Plan in information security part.
>>In addition, I published my thesis about Business Continuity Plan in information security part.
I\'m working at SK Infosec, which is the biggest local company in information security field in Korea.My job position is a information security consultant.
>>I\'m working at SK Infosec, which is the biggest local company in information security field in Korea, as an information security consultant.
I handdled a lot of project related with information security.
>>I handled a lot of projects related with information security.
I used to work for finance company, such as bank, securities, Marine & Fire Insurance.
>> I used to work for financial companies such as bank, security, marine & fire insurances.
As a information security consultant, I identified information assets and their value.
>>As an information security consultant, I identify information assets and their value.
I checked business needs for information processing and communication.
>>I check the business needs for information processing and for communication.
I set Information Security policies, guidelines, templates to implement customer\'s protection activity in compliance with ISMS Standard, Privacy act, Information network act, etc.
>>I set Information Security policies, guidelines and templates to be implemented for customer\'s protection activity in compliance with ISMS Standard, Privacy act, Information network act, etc.

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